We laid back on the couch, our feet resting on the poof as we watched our favorite show. It was a lovely Saturday evening and the stars shone brightly in the night sky. The gentle breeze swayed the trees from side to side and the leaves sparkled in the silver moonlight. The show was amazing until the two showed up. Jake and Pete. They walked into the room and looked around; their arms locked together. Then they turned and kissed. A deep, passionate kiss. A man to another man. How on earth….what were they doing? Is this even legal? In front of my children? I wished there was a pause and rewind button in life. The kind that existed in the cassette player of yester years. I would have rewound the tape and deleted that part. My heart pounded in my throat as I turned and looked at the two babies. Our eyes met and she asked: “Mum, you don’t support it, do you?”

I swallowed. The I swallowed again. I needed some water. My throat felt parched and a light sweat sat on my brow. I had no idea how this would go. I was hoping this moment will never come but I guess I was living a lie. It was all over: in the media, in books, in cartoons, even the emoji on my phone. The best I could do was face it and get over with it. At least she asked for my opinion. That I knew what to say.

“No dear, I don’t support it. It is not part of who I am or what I believe in” I replied. The younger one was listening. My head felt a little light. Thankfully, I was seated.  She went on with her discourse: “I am not against it. I know this sounds off, but I don’t support or oppose it. Is it because of your Christian faith that you oppose it?” I answered in the affirmative. “Well, I know the old testament spoke against it”, she went on, “But we no longer live our lives based on the old testament. Otherwise we would still be doing a lot of the things it says. That is why I feel I shouldn’t be against them but I personally wouldn’t think of being one”. At least that put a part of my heart to rest. She was straight. But she did not oppose it in others. ‘You do you’ is the new slang.

I assured her that even in the new testament the Bible condemned homosexuality. She wanted the verse, and the context. I gladly offered to go through it with her. It hit me how many children have these questions lingering in their minds, yet never getting the opportunity to talk to their parents about it. Some because there are not available for the conversation. Others because their parents will hear none of it. Their no is no and that’s it. No explanation. While this may hold water with younger children, the older ones want to engage, to have a conversation. Not because they want to push your buttons or expose your weakness as a parent but purely for the desire to understand. Yet other parents were simply clueless. No idea what LGBT is all about. Or BDSM for that matter (yep; if you know, you know). Welcome to the information age.

This is the age of many transitions. From old ways of doing things to new ways, from limited contact to global villages, from slow living to a life so fast paced it outruns the speed of light. From ‘do as I say and ask no questions’ to ‘why?’ It calls for preparedness as a parent. We cannot afford to sit and be couch potato parents. We will lose and so will our children. We cannot afford to be oblivious or not know. Learning and continually upgrading ourselves to stay ahead of our game is no longer street lingo, it is expected of us as parents. The younger our children, the more we need to do to prepare for their tomorrow. Fortunately, parent, there are resources, and information is liberally out there. You want to parent? It takes hard work, tenacity and pure grit. It is not for the faint-hearted they say, this time it is for real.

For the young people out there, I hope they will feel free to ask. Ask your dad, mum, auntie, teacher, older siblings but for heaven’s sake be cautious who you talk to: mis-information is real. Take in the information but make your choices. Remember, choices have consequences so choose wisely.

Meanwhile, I have a tender young heart to nurture in the ways of the Lord and ensure that whatever life throws at her, her core is secure.